The meeting was called to order at seven sharp with the usual pounding of the Bass Ale bottle on the head table. (The Bass Ale serves two purposes, which is why it’s usually half full.)
The President called for quiet several times, announcing there were preliminary matters, though procedural, that needed to be taken care of because the Ostrich Society was a legitimate organizations and proprieties had to be observed.
A shout from the second table back called for dispensing with preliminaries, which was seconded by a throng of voices, and passed unanimously.
First order of business was the treasurer’s report which was a plea for more revenue since the state raised the price on liquor and bourbon was the clubs drink of choice. A motion was heard to drag one dollar more from every pot of the poker game and after some discussion, passed unanimously.
The President asked for fishing reports which quieted the members. In fact it became so quiet, several dogs got to their feet anticipating some sort of action. The President suggested if security was a consideration, reports could omit exact location, just identifying the county in which the water was located.
Harold got up and reported he had been carp fishing and had a great day finding and enticing “golden bones” last Saturday. He didn’t give the location, but everyone knew carp could be found almost everywhere and, despite old prejudices, they were a good fight on a fly rod. Harold went on to say the trick to carp was to take them on surface or just below surface flies. There were some yawns in the room, but some nodding heads too.
Someone asked if the flies he used were dough ball or donut patterns…..more laughter.
Alf got up to say he’d been tying flies for the past few days in anticipation of the white fly hatch that was starting to be seen on northern rivers. White Millers were the pattern and he added his own twist to the pattern.
“I tie them with one wing, upright,” he said. “I’ve been missing a lot of strikes and found if I leave the fly on the water, it gets a second strike quickly there after. I guess when their crippled, they attract more attention.”
Jack shouted out, “who are you trying to kid, this is just a way for you to make use of most of the flies that come off of your vise. You only get one out of three right.”
The group roared and with a cocked head and slight frown, Alf looked over at Jack and said, “that’s true, but at least mine start out that way. Yours end up that way because you mutilate what ever you try to tie on your leader with those sausage fingers. It’s a good thing your flies are complete at the beginning, because if you started with an amended pattern, by the time you got it tied to the tippet, you be fishing with a bare hook.” (Jack was the Society’s choice for bartender because the bourbon was poured two fingers at a time and using Jack’s fingers produced generous drinks.)
More laughter erupted causing the President to Bass Ale the group back to order. “We’ll take a five minute break to replenish your glasses.”
After the break, Bill opted to set up poker table. Alf got out the euchre cards and the group wadded to their chose game. The dogs shifted; the older dogs, knowing the routine moved to the side so as not to be under foot, and the pups following and nibbling at heels until they were scolded. Within minutes the cards were being dealt and only a few gathered around the head table to continue the discussion of what was happening where.
The business meeting was adjourned.
Respectfully submitted to be the Truth, Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth ….give or take a lie or two.
Terry H. Drinkwine, Secretary of the Ostrich Society.